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Dear Amy: Our daughter’s overseas wedding was first scheduled two summers ago. Family from both sides (mostly) don’t live there, so with the borders closed, the ceremony was postponed — twice.

Amy Dickinson 

Now the wedding is on, for this July. We are seeing that a number of guests who RSVP’d that they were coming the first two times now say they cannot make it.

We will miss seeing them.

So here is the question: Since we already have the lovely venue paid for a specific number of guests, is it tacky to invite those who “didn’t make the first guest list” originally to join us now?

If it is not tacky, how might we even phrase that?

 Wondering About Wedding

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Dear Wondering: When it comes to “tacky,” I take a stance that’s probably more Dolly Parton than Emily Post.

I say, be authentic, be polite, and if you’re backed into a corner be truthful!

Issue your invitations. You might call this event Third Time’s the Charm.

I don’t think it’s necessary to make any reference to previous plans when you invite people.

If prospective guests inquire: “Hey, I thought you didn’t have room for me!” say, “The pandemic really messed with our plans and some close family members can’t make it overseas this summer, so if you are able to join us on relatively short notice, we’d love it!”

Dear Amy: My husband, kids and I live in a different state than most of my family.

We are planning a trip to my family’s state and would like to invite my parents and grandmothers to rent a cabin for a few nights.

I don’t see my grandmothers often as they are not well enough to travel too far. I want to be able to enjoy a wonderful and relaxing trip with them as I am worried about the amount of time I have left to spend with them. I want to create happy memories with them, my parents and children together.

My grandmothers get along great and often spend time together. They are both widowed, but one of them remarried about a year ago.

Amy, this man is rude and pretentious and makes everyone uncomfortable.

We all keep our feelings to ourselves and are respectful when we have been around him, but my parents and my other grandmother are not a fan of this man.

I worry spending a whole weekend with him would be too much for everyone.

His presence would likely turn this relaxing time with my family into a weekend revolving around his lectures, narcissistic antics and drama.

Is it selfish of me to only want to spend this precious time with those who bring happiness? Would it be wrong of me to only invite my grandmother and not her condescending new spouse?

How might I extend this exclusive invite? Or is there a polite and discreet way to ask he not make this trip a disagreeable one?

Happy Memories Only

Dear Happy: Your grandmother chose to marry, and when she did, the man she married entered your family. For better and — it seems — for worse, he is there.

It is not selfish of you to want “only happiness,” but no family can be guaranteed only happy experiences or happy memories. Every family must deal with the challenges presented by their reality.

I suggest that you issue this invitation to everyone, and then do your best to manage this disruptive new family member during your weekend together.

If you establish a baseline willingness to stand up to him (“Excuse me, Steve, but I’d love to hear what my grandmother thinks …”) you might have a better time.

Dear Amy: “Concerned Sister” was trying to prompt her aging sister to make some plans for her future.

Thank you for highlighting the need for families to discuss end-of-life issues with one another.

My mother descended into the ravages of dementia before we had ever discussed these things. In the years I spent caring for her, I often wished I knew what her wishes were. It would have made everything so much easier for me and for other family members who were trying to provide the best care for her.

We were very much in the dark, and I still have regrets about that tough period.

With Regrets

Dear Regrets: The situation you describe is what journalist Ellen Goodman was struggling with through her own mother’s illness and death, inspiring her to start The Conversation Project (, which provides helpful prompts to get families talking.

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You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.

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I’m an interior expert, people make three common mistakes with their living rooms and they instantly make it look tacky

THE living room is the centre point of your house - so naturally you want it to look its best.

But an interior design expert has revealed the common styling mistakes you're making - which could make it look tacky.

3Nick Lewis revealed the three mistakes your making in your living room which make it look tackyCredit: tiktok/@nicktalksdesign

Nick Lewis, lives in Vancouver, shared the three common mistakes people make when styling their living rooms which instantly makes them look tacky.

On his TikTok account, Nick Talks Design, he gave three simple pointers as to why your living room may not look as good as you think it should.

He said: "First, is too small of a rug.

"Having a rug sit right the coffee table and not under any of the couch or leg chairs makes it look really silly, and kind of sad."

Nick suggests getting a rug that goes under the two front legs of your coach or side chairs to create a more luxe look.

The second common mistake Nick sees people make is having too much furniture that matches.

He explained: "If you go into a retailer the staff are going to try and sell you the couch and the side chairs to match.

"But don't do it.

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"This makes it a really boring, flat, cookie-cutter space."

Instead, Nick recommends choosing different pieces that work well together.

He also explained that you could use pieces form the same collection but to try different coloured pieces to work together.

Finally, Nick said poor space planning - by that he means it feels too crowded.

"Make sure you have a space built for humans, make sure their is space for people to feel comfortable.

"They need room to move, to breath, to eat, to drink in your living room," he explained.

The video has gone viral with over 500k views, and many were grateful for his tips.

One wrote: "Totally agree with these! So glad you’re on Tiktok now!"

Read More on The SunAIR TIME Tom Cruise slammed by viewers over Jubilee appearance

"Wonderful advice," another added.

A third commented: "The furniture one is a game changer for me. My room is big and odd shape. Mix n match is perfect. thank you. also can confirm rug advice. It's true.

3Too small of a rug can make you front room look tackyCredit: tiktok/@nicktalksdesign 3Nick recommended buying a larger rug to create a chic living roomCredit: tiktok/@nicktalksdesign

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